DESCRIPTION:
The first step is acknowledging what stage of change you are in as this clarity will help you decide what you need to do, or in some cases, what you don’t need to do. Carlo DiClemente and J. O. Prochaska, six stages of change model is the perfect tool to gain clarity on your readiness to make a change.
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
- Precontemplation: You’re not ready to change, as you deny that you even have ADHD.
- Contemplation: You consider your ADHD symptoms are a problem and you need to change.
- Determination: You make a commitment to change and start making plans to manage your ADHD.
- Action: You implement your plans.
- Maintenance: You are building new habits and managing any relapses to old habits.
- Termination: You have reached the change you want and no longer have to put any effort into making a change.
TRANSCRIPT:
(00:01):
How do you know when you’re ready to make changes? You’ve tuned into Scattered Focused, Done Re-imagining Productivity with ADHD, a podcast for ADHD, adults like you who want to learn how to adopt the best strategies, tools, and skills to get your essential work done in a way that works with the way your brain is wired. I’m Marla Cummins, and I’m glad you’re joining me today on this journey to reimagining productivity with ADHD.
So you can get what is important to you done without trying to do it like everyone else can. ADHD adults effectively maintain changes. Recently in an online mastermind group, one of our members mentioned one of the strategies she uses to get started on a task she doesn’t know how to do is to tell herself, I don’t know how to do this yet. And by using this phrase, she can remember not knowing how to do something is not permanent.
(00:57):
That is, she can learn how to do it. She goes on to say, this feels like a less fatalistic approach. I think this is a great way to approach learning how to manage your ADHD because there is a lot you don’t know yet. You really want to know how to better manage your ADHD symptoms. But if you get overwhelmed by not being able to make the changes you envision easily or quickly, you may shut down and avoid even trying. I know that’s not what you want.
So let’s see how you can adopt a more helpful perspective about change, specifically when it comes to managing your ADHD. Because you already know some mindsets are helpful and others hold you back from doing what you want. The first step is acknowledging what stage of change you are in as this clarity will help you decide what you need to do, or in some cases, what you don’t need to do.
(01:55):
Carlo De Clemente and Jo Prochaska, six stages of change model is the perfect tool to gain clarity on your readiness to make a change. And I’ll describe this model in terms of what it may look like for someone with A DHD. First pre-contemplation, you’re not ready to change as you deny that your ADHD symptoms are problematic or maybe that you even have ADHD. Likely not the case for you if you’re listening to this.
The second stage contemplation, you are willing to consider your A DHD symptoms are problematic and change may be necessary. Third stage determination. You are committed to change and start making plans to understand and manage your ADHD. Fourth stage you implement your plans. And then the fifth stage maintenance, you are building new habits and addressing any relapses to old habits. For adults with ADHD, getting to this point is a cause for celebration.
(03:04):
And the sixth stage termination you have reached the desired change and no longer have to put any effort into making a change. In my experience, most ADHD adults don’t reach this point as they’re always going to have to put some effort into keeping their habits up. Not a bad thing. It just is what it is. Let’s take a deeper dive into five of these stages so you can identify where you are with respect to a change you want to make.
Again, stage one, pre-contemplation in ADHD. In the pre-contemplation stage, you are not ready to make any changes. In fact, in this stage, you deny that you have any problems. So of course you do not need to make any changes. There may be four reasons for this reluctance, rebellion, resignation, and rationalization. If you are reluctant to acknowledge your ADHD challenges, you simply may not understand the impact it’s having on your life.
(04:12):
Alternatively, it may be a matter of inertia. You just do not have the motivation to seek out more information. And you may be very committed, even if it is to your detriment to living your life on your own terms and view the idea of needing to change with suspicion. So you rebell by resisting the idea you may have ADHD. If you have been diagnosed later in life or are first getting a glimmer you may have ADHD you may have been dealt with lifetime of frustration and challenges.
And although you may be overwhelmed, you may have given up hope you can get it better so you are resigned to living your life the way it is. But it can get better. Last, you may have decided your ADHD is just not a problem for you. You rationalize that your ADHD symptoms are a problem for others. So you do not need to change.
(05:09):
If you are in the pre-contemplation stage, you are where you are and that’s okay. This model is not about making judgements. When you’re ready and possibly with support, you’ll be ready to move to the next stage. Once you’ve jumped the denial hurdle, you are ready to enter the second stage, which is the contemplation stage. You are willing to consider. Your ADHD symptoms are creating problems in your life and are willing to learn more about ADHD.
I imagine most people who are reading this are, at least at this stage, in this stage, while you may still be ambivalent and may procrastinate about making changes, you are also seriously considered taking action. That is you are dipping your toes in the water, getting ready to jump. Well, you may not be all in yet, give yourself credit for taking this step. Because even though it does not look action oriented, in truth, there’s a lot going on.
(06:09):
It is just not obvious. As is mostly internal work. You’re working through your ambivalence and getting ready to take action. That’s important to get to the next stage. The next stage is stage three. In this stage, you are ready to make a commitment to manage your ADHD. You may think to yourself, I’ve got to change. I don’t want to keep going on like this.
What can I do? Where can I get help? In this stage, you create a plan to effectively make changes to better manage your ADHD. You may be tempted to skip this step. After all, you are tired of your ADHD symptoms you want to fix and you want it now. Understandable, and adults with ADHD aren’t fans of taking their time to get to the goal line, especially when they see it so clearly. Sound familiar. But a commitment to change is not enough.
(07:07):
You also know without a solid enough plan and support system, your efforts may fall flat. Then your commitment may waiver because you do not see your efforts getting you anywhere. This may end in you deciding it will never get better, so you quit trying. To minimize the chances of quitting trying to learn how to manage your ADHD take time to do enough planning, including finding support. Because faster is not always better. There are a few questions to consider as you’re preparing to make the changes you envision.
One, where do I want to focus first? Trying to make too many changes at once can be overwhelming. One way you can figure this out is to use the wheel of life, which I’ve included with the podcasts on my website, and that will help you decide where you might want to make changes right now. What type of resources do I need to learn how to make the changes I want is another question.
(08:11):
You may decide to start with a group such as the group that I offer, the ADDed Perspectives Group or another group that suits your needs. Another question you can ask yourself, what kind of support do I need to make these changes? You may decide you want individual support, such as a therapist or an ADHD coach. Alternatively, or along with professional support, you may decide to work with an accountability partner.
The fourth stage, when you reach this stage, you are putting your plans in action. It can be an exciting time as you experience success in managing your A DHD. Remember, nothing succeeds like success. Remember though that you still are experimenting and will need to change your plans until you get one that works well enough for you to meet your objectives. But even when you feel you have the right plan, you may get bored of it and stop using a particular tool or strategy.
(09:15):
Well, I know this is frustrating and you may be reticent to try something else after putting in all that work, it makes sense to change it up. Sure, it takes time to switch up strategies and tools, but better to switch it up and find something you’re interested in and will use than not using anything at all, right? Part of learning how to work with your A DHD is learning when to stick with what you have and when it may be time to fold.
Not always an easy decision I know. The fifth stage when you reach the maintenance stage, the fifth stage, you already put a great deal of emotional and mental energy into putting a plan into action to better your ADHD. Hopefully, you are proud of your hard work, but you’re also likely feeling pretty spent and may think, what more could I possibly do?
(10:11):
I put the pedal to the metal and my plan is in action. You’re not done. Because remember, inconsistency is the hallmark of A DHD. But when you inexplicably stop using what worked, maybe because you’re bored, as I said before, you may wonder whether you’re even capable of maintaining the changes you made. You are for sure. But you will at times revert to old habits, especially when you are stressed and overwhelmed. To minimize the chances of this, it’s helpful to anticipate potential roadblocks.
As ADHD, adults tend to be future oriented you may need help looking ahead. Accept things will come up out of the blue and that you couldn’t have anticipated, and you will need to adjust your plan. Have a plan in place to address the occasional detours as they arise. And another one is to reflect during your weekly review where you are staying the course and where you’re going off. Then you could decide to either change your plans or adjust back to working the plan.
(11:24):
After all, it’s important to give yourself compassion and grace when your plan isn’t working as well as you would like. Because if you can do this, you will find it easier to figure out how to get back on course and maintain the changes you want. Change takes time. While the amount of time you spend at each stage of the change process will be different, you’ll need to go through all of the stages. Where are you now with respect to a change you want to make and what do you need to do to get to the next stage?
That’s it for now. I’m really glad you joined me and stayed until the very end. If you’re interested in learning more about my work with adults with ADHD, check out my website, marlacummins.com. Of course, if you’ve learned a thing or two from today’s podcast, which I hope you have, please pass along the link to anyone else in your circles you think might benefit. And until next time, this has been Scattered, Focused, Done. And I’m Marla Cummins wishing you all the very best on your journey to reimagining productivity with ADHD.
