{"id":10217,"date":"2023-11-19T01:05:27","date_gmt":"2023-11-19T01:05:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marlacummins.com\/stage2026\/?p=10217"},"modified":"2026-01-29T08:30:10","modified_gmt":"2026-01-29T13:30:10","slug":"adhd-adults-can-set-boundaries-and-feel-good-about-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marlacummins.com\/stage2026\/adhd-adults-can-set-boundaries-and-feel-good-about-it\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Set Boundaries Around Time When You Have ADHD"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Boundaries are rules you set to let others know what is okay and what is not okay for you based on your values and priorities. They protect your personal and mental space, including physical, sexual, intellectual or mental, emotional, material or financial, and time boundaries. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

For this post, I\u2019ll focus on how to set boundaries around your time<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How about you? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you have a hard time saying no<\/strong> when someone makes a request of you? And then you end up saying yes<\/strong> even when it would have been better to say no<\/strong>. For Adults with ADHD, this is a common challenge and is often one of the barriers<\/strong> to focusing<\/strong> on what is important to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What if you could say no more often? How would that help you focus on what is essential<\/a> in your life?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ready to try?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why ADHD Adults Have a Hard Time Setting Boundaries <\/h2>\n\n\n\n

While I\u2019m guessing you already have an inkling, aren\u2019t you curious why you just can\u2019t do it \u2014 say no?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After all, how many times have you thought to yourself, \u201cWhy did I just agree to do that?! How am I going to fit that in with everything else?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to Vanessa Bohns<\/a>, Professor of Organizational Behavior at Cornell University, we may struggle to say no because:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We don\u2019t want to reject people. We don\u2019t want people to think poorly of us \u2026 so we are really managing the impression other people have of us.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

As an adult with ADHD, it may be particularly hard for you to say no because of your history, perceived or otherwise, of falling short. So, you may end up saying yes to prove<\/strong> to yourself and others that you are capable<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You want others<\/strong> to think well of you<\/strong>, of course. But does saying yes, when no is a better answer, accomplish this?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You might also find it hard to create boundaries because of your ADHD challenges around time blindness<\/strong>. Because you don\u2019t know how long something will take, you may be overly optimistic about how much you can do. So, again, you end up saying yes to too many commitments. You can learn how to estimate time better.<\/a>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Challenges around self-regulation <\/strong>can also contribute to the difficulty you have with setting boundaries. As you may say yes to a commitment before giving it enough thought. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

How about you? <\/strong>Are any of these reasons why you don\u2019t set boundaries around your time?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What Happens When You Say \u201cYes\u201d And Want to Say \u201cNo\u201d?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Sure, in the moment, your intention in saying yes may be to have people think positively of you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And sometimes it may work out just fine \u2014 you are able to fulfill the request, and your other responsibilities don\u2019t suffer too much.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What about those times when it does not work out<\/strong>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may end up<\/strong>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n