Do you ever wonder if you are heading in the right direction?
In Stop Letting Your Thoughts Run Your Life! I wrote about how our thoughts can create our reality.
But what if your current thought is not really true for you? You may be acting on “bad information”! And certainly not going in the right direction based on what is really true for you.
If you are like many adults with ADHD, you may have the uncanny ability to create extraordinary stories with little basis in reality. I know I do!
Persisting toward reaching goals is a common challenge for many adults with ADHD. And the stories we create may make it even harder!
Though I have been “spinning stories” for a long time, I still surprise myself at my story making ability. Sometimes the story is about failing at some aspect of my life. It could look like a version of the following business related tale.
He emailed me and asked for an introductory session. I emailed him back, but have not heard from him, yet. People are just “fishing” and do not really want coaching. I’m not going to get anymore clients. My business is going to fail, and I’m going to have to find a job. But I’m not going to be able to get a job. Even if I do get a job, I’m not going to have enough flexibility. Then I’m not going to be able to be as available for my daughter as I need to be…
And then the story continues with my daughter failing in life. All because a prospective client did not return my email.
Whew! Wears me out, too.
When I can reel in my thoughts, though, I can see that the sky is not really falling. In this case, I can honestly see that my business is not going to fail.
How do I remind myself of this?
I rely on a very simple but powerful method of questioning created by Byron Katie, author of Loving What Is: Four questions that can change your life.
The Four Questions
Step 1 – Is it true?
Yes, it could all be true.
Step 2 – Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
Prospects call all the time. Just because someone emails or calls does not mean that they are a “serious” prospect; people are at all different level of readiness. This is the reality of business.
And I have been consistently successful in my business.
Step 3 – How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
I feel like giving up, like I want to crawl in hole. I may even stop doing some of the important parts of my work.
Step 4 – Who would you be without the thought?
I would not feel like every non-responsive prospective client means that I am going to fail.
I would consistently follow the system I have created to respond to inquiries about my services. It has served me well so far.
I would remind myself that sometimes I just need to “let the fish run.”
I would not worry. I would continue doing what works, as well as refining my practices in the areas I need to improve.
Added Perspectives Bottom Line
Racing thoughts are common for adults with ADHD. Do you find yourself running down the rabbit hole and getting lost in a maze of your thoughts?
First, don’t believe everything you think!
If you are interested in putting the brakes on your thoughts, practice using this method. You can begin to get more accurate information on what is really true for you.