Marla Cummins

ADHD Coach and Productivity Consultant

ADHD and Performance: Putting The Odds In Your Favor

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ADHD and Completion

Why is it that you do not follow through on the goals that are truly important to you?!

If you are like most adults with ADHD you may at times scratch your head and wonder why, despite your best intentions, you don’t follow through.

Though you may at times question whether this is true, it not because of lack of desire. Remember, you have already decided that the goal is one you truly want to pursue.

My guess is that you have not set up your environment to support you in achieving what you want with your ADHD in mind.

Time to close the gap between your intentions and actions.

 

Intention into Action

First, think about how you talk about your intentions. You may hear yourself saying things, like:

  • “I’ll try to…”
  • “I want to …”
  • “I should …”

I think some adults with ADHD equivocate with statements like these because they do not have faith in their ability to follow through. Anyway, that is what I see for many of my clients. Do you think this may be true for you?

If it is, you may not fully commit to your goal. Rather, you make halfhearted attempts.

Alternatively, you may think about what you want to do, but not make a decision of whether to pursue it or not. If you do this, it is still taking up your head space and you have to keep revisiting and revisiting the idea.

I’m sure you have better things to do!

 

Semantics Matters

I think semantics matter. So, the first step is saying

“I am going to…by (pick a date)”

Or

“I am not going to…”

Or

“Maybe someday I’ll…, but I have no intention of doing it now”

 

Check out my article on deciding what to keep on your plate, ADHD and Productivity: Do You Know What Action to Take?

Of course, just saying it more emphatically doesn’t really matter, if you do not really believe it.

So, what would help you really believe that you could follow through on your intentions?

 

Just Do It?!

Your tendency may be just to jump in and start. After all, like many adults with ADHD, you may have a general impatience with process. This is not always bad!  In fact, the “just do it” way of operating can help you break the initial resistance to getting started and can lead to accomplishing great things.

But if you find yourself stumbling about, and not progressing the way you want, it is likely time for a more deliberate strategy.

Creating a strategy is the second step in putting the odds in your favor and will also give you more assurance that you can reach your goal.

 

Visualizing a Path

While the exact strategy for reaching a goal will be different for each person and each goal, below is a place for most to start:

  1. While linear thinking may not be your strong suit, creating a timeline of all of the actions you need to take can be incredibly helpful. Ask for help, if you are having difficulty doing this.

Even if the plan changes down the road you will have an idea of how to proceed initially. Better than having ideas swirl about in your head. Doing this for small (painting a room) and large (marketing your business) projects alike will help you get started.

 

  1. Then break it down and schedule time to do each piece. Even if you do not have a lot of time, you will surprise yourself at what you can accomplish when you slowly chip away at even a seemingly insurmountable goal.

You probably already knew to do this though, right?

 

Choices and Point of Performance

While you were reading the above section you may have been saying to yourself: Right, sure, Marla, I know this already! I still don’t do what I need to do even when I have a plan!!

I get it, really.

As an adult with ADHD, just having a plan is not enough to insure that you will follow through on your intentions.

While it is sometimes hard to make the choice you want at the right time, there are strategies to, yes, increase the odds.

Read on to see some ways of doing this.

 

ADHD and Memory

A critical piece and the third step in having a greater chance of matching your actions with your intentions is remembering your intentions.

Not always an easy feat.

Working memory or the ability to process information to make decisions and hold other information at the same time is often weak in adults with ADHD. Since working memory plays an important role in your prospective memory, your ability to remember your intentions, it important to understand how this affects your ability to follow through.

Bottom line. Your memory may be more like swiss cheese than a trap door, but it has no relationship to your intelligence, really.

The key is not to rely on your memory.

Here are a few  workarounds for a weak working memory:

  1. write a note as soon as an idea pops into your head
  2. record your ideas on your phone, if you cannot write
  3. when you think of a new task put it on your paper or electronic task list immediately
  4. take notes when in meetings or in informal discussions
  5. set an alarm to remind yourself when you need to transition to a new task.
  6. refer back to your written plans as often as you need
  7. other?

Using strategies and tools to help you remember your intentions will bring you one step closer to following through.

But it still may not be enough… And, yes, of course, there are strategies to help you.

 

ADHD and Choices In The Moment

You have a plan and reminders. The fourth step is creating an environment that will support you in doing what you know.

  1. Set up things in advance. What do you need to get started on writing your resume or business plan, painting the deck or going running.  Get out your files, list, tools, clothes…
  1. Create a visual of images and words to remind yourself of why your goal is important to you. This will make the choice you want to make really stand out.
  1. Eliminate distractions as much as possible. Close the door, turn on the white noise, shut off facebook, disable the email pop-up reminders…
  1. Resist placing yourself in situations where you may be tempted to stray from your intentions. If you know that getting in the car to do “just one errand” will likely lead to hours of “just one more thing,” don’t get in the car. Work on your project as you intended, and then go wandering.

What else can you do to make your long term goals more prominent than the seemingly urgent day to day tasks that will always pop up regularly?

 

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Marla has an excellent understanding of ADHD and a great knowledge base of related topics. She was able to expertly guide me through decisions I needed to make and helped me tackle big and small things I needed to do. Knowing I had adhd was only 25% of the battle for me. I’m so glad that I chose to stay committed to coaching. Now that I have more self awareness about myself and my adhd I trust myself to get what I need done. I don’t try to do too much anymore and when I’ve done all I can on my own I’m more willing to reach out for support. My production is way higher than I expected, but I’m also way less stressed and that makes it easier on a personal level at home too.

— A.V., Vice President - Investment Sales

Coaching with Marla was very useful, and also essential. I do not know what I would have done w/o the Sunday night periods of going over the past week, looking forward to the next week, and making a plan. The actual phone check ins on Tuesdays…crucial, to help me get clear, as well as for the simple act of accountability. Marla served as a focal point (as in, ‘oh, yeah, this was what I was doing’), and–at times–as an anchor that grounded things. I can not imagine having had to go through the past 6 months w.o. someone ‘outside’ me, and my life, to help me stay the course. Now, I feel more confident in my abilities, in what I have to offer. I realize I do have options. How freeing! Lastly, but certainly not least, I have a very, very clear sense of my values, and I am using those to guide me, and that helps me to trust in my course.

— Cindy R., Writer and Editor

Before working with Marla I got by by winging it but I was not keeping up with the flow of information and I wasn’t managing my time productively. I was often reactive and overwhelmed. I didn’t even think I could be productive… Identifying where and why I was having struggles and having a person to help me through those was the most helpful. Marla is non-judgemental so when something didn’t go as expected, I felt OK talking to her about it and exploring different options to try.  She is a very good listener and is able to give helpful insights and suggestions. I truly enjoy our conversations. The outcome that I appreciate the most is that I feel more in control. Before there was always something I was forgetting to do or follow-up on. Now I think I have much better handle on things.  Also, I am able to focus more time on longer term projects so they don’t become a complete crisis when getting close to the due dates. This has eliminated the last minute rush that used to happen all the time. I am also just calmer. When I started to work with Marla I was at a point in my life that I was not satisfied with how my life was going. I wish I had done this earlier!

— M.P., Controller

What I gained from working with Marla was invaluable. Marla was consistently supportive, positive and uncritical. I learned to honor the way I work best, and am more accepting of my ADD and other characteristics. Now I ask myself, how can I get what I need to get done without running against my own personality? After learning more about ADD from Marla, I don’t think of my challenges as a personal weakness. This change in my thinking allows me to better handle my challenges by thinking of strategies to manage them, rather than engaging in self blame! Yes, cost was definitely a factor when I decided to work with Marla, but I knew that this is what good professionals charge. Being able to make choices that are right for me and learn strategies that last a life time is invaluable to me. The investment was certainly worth it. From working with Marla, I learned a lot about goal setting, meeting objectives, and doing that as a person with ADD. If you are stuck or frustrated, I would certainly hire Marla as a coach.

— C.O., Financial Manager

I have a lot more peace of mind, less stress, much less anxiety… I feel that we make progress in every session and always feel more confident that I am learning skills that will help me personally and professionally. I particularly like that I do not feel ashamed when I talk about areas I want to improve. Understanding that I wasn’t broken, and just think about things differently was key. Trying to learn the way non-ADHD people learn was a mistake I have repeated my whole life. I now know what the best environment is for me and can recognize distractions and noise immediately. I am now able to have way more confidence to let go of the recurring thoughts about tasks, because I have tools that remember for me. I drop a lot less balls. In fact, typically, if I don’t do something now, it’s because I consciously lowered it on my priority list. I couldn’t do that very well before. I used to just shut down and drop everything because the stress was so great. That never happens anymore. Thanks again for all your help.  Your coaching was probably the best investment I've ever made in me!

— T.D., Sales Professional

Together we identified obstacles that were preventing me from truly going after the job that I would be happiest in. I’m balancing a full workload (I currently have 4 part-time jobs), graduate school, and 15-20 hours of training as a competitive cyclist. For a few years, I was having trouble committing myself to finding a new job and this was, in turn, making it difficult for me to work toward my graduate degree. I recently overcame a major hurdle in my progress toward my degree and am in touch with an increasing pool of potential employers. Marla is a time management guru, to be sure, but her most unique skill is her ability to ask questions that help me to step outside of myself for a moment and take a hard look at my motivations and decision making processes. Her questions have helped me to become more independently active in that I now know how to ask myself the kinds of questions that Marla might ask me. Without Marla’s help, I probably would not be as far along in my job search as I am now and would still be far from finishing my degree. Thanks, Marla!

— Paul D., PhD Candidate / High-School Teacher

Through our work I clarified my goals, identified communication issues, fuzzy planning and established personal accountability. In working with Marla, I received practical organizing and planning techniques, inspiration and empowering suggestions.  Marla helped me work with each issue as developing life skills and emphasized personal responsibility. Marla is an excellent coach and compassionate, encouraging mirror. I recommend her without any reservations.

— Fred B., Business Consultant

The coaching worked so well because it was tailored just for me - not a cookie cutter type of experience. It was exactly what I needed! We identified and worked on my concerns - got at the root cause and figured out what I could do to make it better. I proved I am capable of growth and change. For one, my communication has improved through the different departments and with my own team. My email and task organization are better, too. I have more tools at my disposal to help with my organization which helps me feel more calm and settled, even when things start to get hectic at work. I have tried to be perfect for too long and it was causing me to focus on the wrong areas... I stopped thinking it is always my fault and I've started to develop a thicker skin when I do make a mistake. I can move on more quickly and stay focused on the current tasks instead of worrying unnecessarily. I am more confident in my abilities and I have learned how to stop worrying as often about things outside of my control. Marla did a wonderful job with everything. Everything we worked on I made improvements in!

— E.A., Human Resource Manager

Marla has been tremendously helpful in keeping me “on track” with important and complex projects during a time when I cannot afford to get lost. At the same time, she is helping me realize that while avocational goals are important, so too are relationships and personal fairness. In our last meeting, Marla helped me begin to tackle a lifelong misapprehension of time and how to gain control of it. More important than problems solved is my greater confidence in addressing problems and trying to solve them, rather than simply quitting because no resolution is apparent. Marla offers a non-judgemental, objective appreciation for the large and small difficulties and success that are not apparent to myself, and a way to order these things so that they can be confronted and appreciated, respectively. She has helped me see what appear to be insurmountable problems as just small impediments. Specifically, she has goaded me into making phone calls to people that I didn’t think would want to hear from me, and to do everything to keep communications channels open. She has also helped me by keeping a focus on the challenge I feel in organizing and constantly reviewing how to strike a balance between letting my schedule get out of control and focusing too intently on it and thus losing track of the bigger picture.

— Josh D., Professional Writer and Editor

Marla was my second coach. The first one did not really help me, so I was kind of skeptical. Marla’s help was astonishing. After only a few calls she seemed to have me figured out pretty well. She called me on empty promises, pushed me just enough never too much, and together we came up with tools that actually work and which I actually use. She has an uncanny ability to know how far she can push me without ticking me off. Thanks to that I never felt pressure to lie about or excuse what I had done or how I was doing. After living with ADD for many years I started believing that I was lazy, stupid, and crazy. Marla was able to convince me that I was none of these by helping me solve small issues and get a track record of success. Once those things were accomplished, many of the pieces sort of fell in to place.

— Marc D., Software Engineer

Marla’s support was critical in reducing anxiety after receiving the diagnosis of ADD. She imparts information in a warm, impartial, professional manner. Marla is always on your side and willing to work at your pace. At the same time, she challenges you to think about your daily decisions and how they impact your life, and your options for change, should you desire it. Marla helps you identify, prioritize, and focus on weaknesses in a nonjudgmental way and plants the seeds of ideas for you to follow up on, either immediately, or in the future when you’re ready. Above all, she compliments your strengths.

— Jane F., Parent

...while working with Marla, I have been able to move into a career that I have always wanted to be in. I spent many years with undiagnosed ADD not knowing why I had such difficulty with staying focused, starting projects and having difficulty finishing them, unable to prioritize what I needed to do in my life, and many of the other symptoms. I finally sought help through a physician who recommended taking medication. It was also suggested I find an ADD coach to help me re-learn new ways of managing my ADD. I contacted Marla, and after the first conversation I felt comfortable enough to give the coaching a try. After a few sessions working with Marla, she was able to help me start developing the goals and tools I needed to start clearing the clutter in my life. Today using the different techniques that I have learned while working with Marla, I manage my time more efficiently, and complete projects to the end. It is good to know that you do not need to make the journey alone with ADD. I look forward to working with Marla now and in the future.

— Chris E., Support Analyst

I've never felt as hopeful as I am now. Marla's reassuring voice and straightforward manner helped me to internalize a consistent approach to each problem. Before I was frazzled, couldn't do what I needed to do and felt like a fraud professionally. When things weren't working before I saw it as a personal failing. We figured out what I needed to do. And now stuff is not falling through my fingers and I'm not surprised by things that come up professionally. Every accomplishment felt reinforcing. I remind myself when I have organizational challenges now that it is my neurobiology, not me! I don't see myself as defective and am not ashamed anymore. I just think about the next step I need to do to figure it out.

— Deborah, Psychologist