Part 2 – ADHD and No Motivation? How to Get Started
If you’re an adult with ADHD and struggle with motivation, of course, you may wonder how the two are related. In Part 1 – Why Motivation Is So Hard When You Have ADHD, I walk you through this connection.
If you haven’t read that yet, it might be helpful to go back and start there.
But right now, you may be even more interested in how you can turn this challenge around. That’s what this post is about. Below, I’ll walk you through some of the ways you can get started and persist even in moments when your mojo isn’t quite there.
What Does Motivation Mean For ADHD Adults?
When people talk about motivation, they’re often referring to a feeling, which is that sense of interest, energy, or drive that makes it easy to start and keep going.
And yes, that kind of motivation exists.
But if you have ADHD, that feeling can be inconsistent. If you rely on it, you may find yourself waiting and waiting…
So in this post, I’m defining motivation as the ability to start and persist, even when you don’t feel like it, when your mojo just isn’t there.
In other words, it’s not about having the right mood. It’s about creating the conditions, supports, and strategies that make action possible anyway.
Identify The Reward for Doing The Task
One of the first steps to take to build this type of motivation is to identify what your reward is for doing the task.
While knowing the reward may not increase the feeling of wanting to do the task, it may motivate you to want to figure out what kind of support you need to access to do the task, as you can see in the example of a former client below.
Bill was responsible for taking out the recycling. But he kept forgetting, and even walking past it when it was overflowing. He just did not notice it. And when he did, it never seemed like the right time. He was in a hurry, or there did not seem to be enough to make it worth the effort.
Unfortunately, this mundane task led to arguments between him and his spouse. Finally, Bill decided he wanted to stop these arguments and figure out how to take care of the recycling.
He identified that the reward for doing the task was connected to his values. He wanted to honor his commitments to his spouse, support her need for a tidy home, and maintain a more peaceful household.
Once he identified the rewards, he became more motivated to figure out how to follow through consistently. That led him to the next step, which was to find a strategy that worked. In the end, the solution was simple: he began taking out the recycling every day on his way to work, whether there was one can or a pile of papers.
Think of a task you have on your plate right now that you do not feel motivated to tackle. What could be a potential reward for doing it?
Make The Task Interesting
Another way to help yourself start and persist is to create an environment that makes doing the task more engaging and appealing to your interest-based nervous system.
So that you’re not waiting for motivation, but rather creating the conditions to build motivation.
One way is to make it a challenge. For example, you could set a timer and see how many emails you can process in a fixed amount of time, or try to beat your best time folding laundry or cleaning the kitchen. An advantage of these strategies, aside from the challenge involved, is that you will be less likely to get distracted.
Adding novelty is another way to make a task more engaging. For example, you might have background noise, such as music, a TV show, or the ambient sounds of working in a café. You could walk on a treadmill. If rewards work for you, reward yourself along the way. Maybe you get your favorite coffee drink or go for a walk after doing a certain amount of work.
And, yes, urgency is, of course, another way to make the task interesting. The key is not to overuse it so it causes stress or compromises the quality of your work, but to use it judiciously. For example, I will write and post a LinkedIn post in the half hour before I need to meet with a client, so I don’t spend too much time on it.
“Order” A Serving Of Motivation From A Dopamenu
There are also other ways to give your brain a quick boost of interest to help you get started, such as choosing an activity from a “dopamenu.”
A dopamenu is simply a list of small, enjoyable activities that give your brain a quick hit of interest or reward — just enough to help you shift into action. You can create your own or choose from this sample Dopamenu.
The goal is to activate your brain so getting started feels more possible and you’re less likely to avoid the task.
So when you’re stuck, instead of trying to force motivation, check out your dopamenu and ask yourself, “What would give my brain the boost it needs to get moving right now?”
Make the Task Feel Doable to Enhance Your Motivation
Making a task easier in some way can make it easier to start and persist. Because when a task feels onerous, it creates a lot of friction, right?
For example, a client was having a hard time getting started on her social media posts to promote her business when she wrote “do post” on her list. But when she started breaking it down into smaller, discrete steps, such as “pick a topic,” it became much easier for her to get started each time because she was clear on what she needed to do, and it felt doable.
Another example is Todd, who struggled to get his taxes in on time, even though being on top of his finances was important to him.
Whenever he saw “Get tax paperwork to Sue” on his task list, he became overwhelmed and avoided it. He told himself, “I’ll do that later…” Eventually, he realized he was procrastinating because the task felt too daunting.
So he started with a first step: “Find the checklist Sue sent me.” Then he decided to work for a minimum of 25 minutes each day, working his way down the checklist. If he felt like it, he would work longer. And if he was unsure how to do something, he reached out to Sue and asked for help. He also body doubled with his spouse.
When he broke it down this way, he immediately felt a sense of relief.
So if you’re having a hard time getting started, ask yourself: How could I make this more concrete and smaller so it feels doable?
Notice Whether the Conditions Support Your Motivation (And Adjust What You Can)
I’m sure you’ve also experienced situations where your environment was hindering your ability to get started and persist.
Perhaps you’re not physically feeling up to doing the task. It might be because you’re tired, hungry, restless, slightly dehydrated, or something else. So, of course, one of the things you can do is check in with yourself and see if there’s something you need.
In addition, we all have optimal times for doing different types of tasks. So, for example, if you’re not a morning person, you may decide to do your cognitive heavy lifting in the afternoon.
Of course, if you’re taking medication, you’ll also want to pay attention to the timing so it aligns with when you need it most.
Then there is the physical environment, which you know can affect your ability to work. Is the temperature right? Is the noise level working for you, not too much and not too little? Do you have enough visual stimulation, but not so much that it becomes distracting?
Take Care Of Any Distractions That Might Be Getting In Your Way
While the wrong internal or external conditions can be a distraction, there are, of course, many other elements that may be distracting for you and making it hard to start and persist.
One of these is your unmet needs, whether social, physical or emotional.
For example, one client just was not getting in his run during the day. When he did his run, he was much more productive. The hurdle for him was recognizing that spending the time going out for a run during the day was going to pay off in higher productivity in the long run.
Another example is a client who recognized that she was actually being too social and wasn’t getting the downtime she needed on the weekends to have the energy she needed during the week.
And if you’re not taking care of your emotional needs, I’m sure you’ve experienced how this can get in the way of your motivation. In fact, it’s not unusual for clients to start working with a therapist after we have completed our work. It’s because of our work that they recognize that they had not been attending to their emotions, and it was getting in their way. Sometimes it just takes a while to untangle everything.
Of course, there are physical distractions with your phone, maybe being the top one, right? Would you be willing to use an app like Freedom or a physical blocker like Bloom or Brick?
Maybe one of your distractions is thinking you should be doing something else, even though you know you can only do one thing at a time. For this challenge, one of my favorite mantras is, “I’m doing this and not that.”
What is getting in your way right now that you might need to take care of, and that you can take care of so that you can feel the motivation to tackle a task that’s not getting done right now?
What Kind Of Support Would Help You Get Started?
You’re also not meant to walk this path alone. Though it may feel like it sometimes.
Sometimes you may need support to get the motivation you need to get started and persist. And that may take many forms.
It could be that some type of accountability, whether just a simple check-in with a text or meeting with an accountability partner or a coach, could be helpful.
Other times, you may find that body doubling, a form of accountability where you work with somebody else either in close physical proximity or virtually, can be helpful. Focusmate is a popular virtual platform for this.
And sometimes you could ask yourself, though the task needs to get done, whether you’re the best person to do it in that moment. It might be that delegating is the answer. Yes, you could mow the lawn. But if you have too much to do and have the resources, could you hire someone?
Could you tap someone at work to do part of a project if you’re struggling to do it on your own because of a lack of time or, perhaps, skills?
What kind of support do you need to start on a task that feels Sisyphean right now?
Should ADHD Adults Wait To Feel Motivated?
Doing all of the above takes a lot of work, no doubt.
So, I’m sure it’s crossed your mind a time or two to consider whether it might be easier to just wait for motivation.
But does waiting for inspiration work for ADHD adults? In my experience, it can. That strategy isn’t wrong. If you can wait until you have the mojo, why not? Then, as I like to say, ride the wave. 🏄
Of course, that’s not always possible. You might decide something needs to get done within a certain time frame, or there’s an external deadline you need to meet.
In those situations, good intentions aren’t enough. When I hear, “I meant to do it” or “I was going to get to it,” the missing piece is usually adequate support or scaffolding, as you saw above.
Because waiting to feel ready is sometimes just too risky, right?
Be Willing To Withstand Some Discomfort
Whatever you decide to do to address your motivation challenges, it’s also important to be willing to tolerate some discomfort.
Because unless you’re really excited about doing something, there’s typically going to be some amount of friction or discomfort.
So rather than avoiding the task, be willing to sit with some amount of discomfort as you’re getting ready to begin. Some people find it helpful to set a timer for a short amount of time, maybe 10 to 15 minutes.
And tell yourself, I just need to get started.
Part of being able to do that is having confidence in your ability to figure out what strategies, processes, and tools you might need, and what resources or support you may need to access along the way.
Even if you’re not there yet.
What ADHD Adults Can Do When Not Feeling Motivated
If you have ADHD, it’s common for your internal motivation to feel inconsistent. Sometimes you may feel energized and ready to dive in. Other times, even tasks that matter deeply to you can feel almost impossible to start.
That doesn’t mean you’re lazy, incapable, or lacking discipline.
More often, it means you may need the right conditions, supports, strategies, or structure to help you get started and persist when your mojo just isn’t there.
Hopefully, some of the ideas above will help you experiment with ways to reduce friction, build momentum, and follow through more consistently on what’s important to you.
(Originally published February 9, 2024)
